Self-Harm Advice to Parents and Carers, from Parents and Carers

This fact sheet was developed in consultation with Parents & Carers. Thank you to everyone involved.

Getting Help

You’re not alone.

Talking about self-harm helps break the loneliness and stigma.

Don’t give up and don’t take no for an answer (from professionals).

Find ways to talk with anyone you think will help you e.g. your own GP.

Keep young people involved and informed about their care.

Helplines & Remote Support for Parents, Carers & Children:

• Sift: sift.org.uk
• Childline: childline.org.uk
• Kooth: kooth.com
• CALM: thecalmzone.net
• Young Minds: youngminds.org.uk

Supporting a Child or Young Person

Finding the balance between offering support and privacy can be hard.

Try to hold on to the thought that your child is more than just their self-harm. They have strengths / interests / hobbies that are important and part of what makes them unique – try to encourage and celebrate these!

Try and find other ways of communicating what’s going on – use text messages, notes, worry monsters, or develop your own short hand code.

Creative approaches can be helpful, and never throw away an idea that might help.

Find ways to help your child identify what they are feeling, and signpost to age appropriate, anonymous and confidential sources of support.

Support For You

People can be kind.

You need support too – find ways of respecting your child’s privacy whilst also getting the help and support you need from family and friends.

Try not to blame yourself, and prioritise some time for looking after yourself. (This doesn’t have to be loads – just have a cup of tea and a sit down, do your nails, read the paper for 5 minutes, do a puzzle, stroke the dog, breathe etc.)

Try not to take your child’s self-harm personally and remember that they won’t want you to tell you everything.

You can spend a lot of time thinking / worrying about your child, so it’s important that you have someone to speak to as well.

And remember… not every bump is about self-harm or mental health, these can be just normal parts of parent/child/teenager relationships.